Daak Weekly: Manto and Chughtai’s Friendship

In a culture obsessed with the passion and drama of romantic love, we often forget to celebrate our friendships, the constant constellations of our lives, witnessing and partaking in our joys and sorrows, even, and especially, the inevitable disappointments of romance. Perhaps even more than our partners, it is our friends who provide us with the emotional and intellectual fulfillment needed to grow into our potential. However, friendships are not without their difficulties; in a relationship that has no social, familial, or legal binding, it must be chosen and nurtured, consciously and intentionally. Yet, friendships are often the first relationships to be set aside amidst life’s clawing demands, in the hopes that they will remain ever fixed when we find the time, energy, or space to come back to them.

A friendship that embodied both these potentials and pitfalls of friendship was the one shared by the doyens of Urdu Literature, Saadat Hasan Manto and Ismat Chughtai. Fortunately, being writers, both memorialised their friendship and their love for each other in writing. Prompted by a fan’s speculation on why they never got married — which Manto called a “ludicrous idea” — he conducted an examination of their relationship in an essay simply titled “Ismat Chughtai.” In recounting night-long arguments, family celebrations, travels, and tribulations, Manto offered a rich and layered slice of his friendship. Despite being keenly aware of her faults and eccentricities, which he liberally pointed out to her in private, he remained fiercely loyal in public, defending her against all critics.

Through literary and commercial success, court cases, births, deaths, and migration, they held each other in a sort of critical fondness, the kind we reserve for those closest to our hearts. In her essay “My Friend, My Enemy,” Chughtai also reflected on her troubled friendship with Manto and paid tribute to her closest intellectual ally whom she loved and hated in equal measure. She recounted their stimulating conversations, which often oscillated between serious philosophical concerns and crude, mundane matters. What remained constant was a call and response — an intellectual ping pong that allowed them to test their ideas and theories against a loving yet unforgiving critic.

However, Manto’s move to Pakistan brought a streak of personal and professional misfortunes, which put an irreversible strain on their friendship. What remained were memories and the undeniable imprints on each other’s life and work.

Not all friendships are meant to last; however, they are meant to be cherished for all the ways in which they have enriched us. So, if you have a friend or friends who have shared laughter, ideas, ideals, and perspectives, let them know what they mean while they are still in your life.

Love,

Team Daak

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We love all the ways in which South Asian literature and art has celebrated friendship and we’ve curated a special Postcard Set on Friendship - get it for your own intellectual and emotional allies!